Choosing new patterns

Well after 6 months of trying to buy this flat, it looks like we are going to have to pull out of it. Too much is unclear and uncertain and it could end up costing us a lot of money. While on the one hand, I can see from a philosophical point of view that as one door closes another opens and that it obviously 'was not meant to be', I really could see us living there and I feel that my little dream is slipping away. Which it's not, but it feels like that, so I need to be sad about that for a little while.

The day we realised it probably wouldn't happen, I rushed onto the internet and immediately started trying to find somewhere else to at least go and look at. I wanted to fix it and make myself feel better. It was like the good old days when I got rejected by some utterly unsuitable guy and thought I'd missed my chance of being with (yet another) 'the one'.

I even got so far as making an appointment for a viewing which would have required me to traipse half way across London in the snow?! to get there while trying to recover from a massive cold that I've got from pushing myself too hard.

You'll be pleased to know I came to my senses and realised that I don't have to rush into looking again. I have decided to take a few weeks off looking and thinking of houses and will just let it go. If I feel inspired, I might start looking again. But until then, I am going to focus on the things I have a semblance of control over and be open to the possibility of the search being simple, loving and gentle (oh and quick and through non traditional as well as traditional channels), will relish in the chance to stick too metaphorical fingers up at the Real Estate guy who despite my best efforts at compassion I cannot stand, and while I'm at it, might even have a cup of tea.

Oh how liberating to find the lessons in the trials and tribulations we face.